Survival Mode: Scaling Back to the Basics

by Mandi on March 5, 2009

source: oplesrope

source: oplesrope

When I wrote my “Organizing as Lifestyle…” post over the weekend, I really thought I was coming out of the six weeks of fog that have characterized this pregnancy. Unfortunately, the morning sickness is not content to leave me alone yet, and I’m back to feeling pretty useless for the most part.

I’m really not a lazy person in general, and I probably stuff too much into my day on a regular basis, but pregnancy has this way of making me want to sit around and do nothing. And while I’ve been pushing through it for the most part, I’m finding that I’m having a harder and harder time doing that. I don’t think it’s because the morning sickness is getting worse, because it probably is better than it was a week or two ago, but it’s more that I’m just tired of having to push through it, tired of feeling this way. I think I’ve had just a small glimpse into how hard having a chronic disease must be.

All of that to say that as I’ve been feeling sick and exhausted again this week, I’ve been thinking about ways I’ve scaled back my household chores and responsibilities to survive the first trimester. It’s easy to beat ourselves up – and I think this is especially true for mothers – when we aren’t doing everything that we feel like we should be doing. But the reality is that there are times when sickness, tragedy or a teething toddler need our attention. And it’s okay to scale back during those times!

For me, it means I’m no longer washing the dishes by hand. In fact, I am really only loading the dishwasher once every two days because I figure I’d rather just do twice as many every other day than having to do it every day.

It means that the laundry is getting washed and folded (ahem, for the most part), but not getting put away very often.

We’re having more pajama days, eating more convenience foods and my husband is handling a lot more of the daily chores.

There are a couple of things I still do almost every day, like making my bed and cleaning up the table and counters, but my standards are much, much lower than normal.

What things do you let slide when needed? What things do you consider non-negotiable? Are you too hard on yourself when you need to scale back, or is it easy for you to go into survival mode when necessary?


  • http://allaccessamy.blogspot.com Amy

    I’m probably too hard on myself when I let the housework, etc slip. I have been fighting the side effects of my anxiety medication a lot lately… it makes me not want to do anything but sleep. What I find easiest to let go is the girls’ playroom (my, oh, my it is baaaddd!) and the girls’ sleeping arrangement. Sometimes it is just easier to “camp out” together in the living room.

    Amy’s last blog post…Please pray for the Macs…

  • http://allaccessamy.blogspot.com Amy

    I’m probably too hard on myself when I let the housework, etc slip. I have been fighting the side effects of my anxiety medication a lot lately… it makes me not want to do anything but sleep. What I find easiest to let go is the girls’ playroom (my, oh, my it is baaaddd!) and the girls’ sleeping arrangement. Sometimes it is just easier to “camp out” together in the living room.

    Amy’s last blog post…Please pray for the Macs…

  • http://www.overcomingbusy.com Marci

    I feel your pain! When I was pregnant with both of my children, I was in bed with severe morning sickness from week 4 til week 34!!! As a “junkie” myself, and a control freak, it was so hard to just lie there and know the floors weren’t getting vacuumed and the bathroom wasn’t as clean as I like it….although the toilet was spotless since I had to clean it 14 times a day!! :) When we had no children, my husband was so gracious and helped so much with the housework. But, face it, with no children there was pretty much no clutter and a pretty clean house. When I was sick and had a 3 year old, I tried to just read with and play with my daughter (while lying on the couch or bed). My husband worked more, so I actually had to ask a friend to come over every couple weeks and clean my house! Talk about humbling! “Can you please come clean my house while I lie on the couch and watch you? It hasn’t been cleaned in a couple weeks and is starting to get really funky…” Don’t be afraid to ask for help if you need it, but don’t worry about not having a spotless house. We’ve all been through it in varying degrees. A spotless, well-organized home at this point would just point to a more serious illness :)

    Marci’s last blog post…Get rid of the clutter!

  • http://www.overcomingbusy.com Marci

    I feel your pain! When I was pregnant with both of my children, I was in bed with severe morning sickness from week 4 til week 34!!! As a “junkie” myself, and a control freak, it was so hard to just lie there and know the floors weren’t getting vacuumed and the bathroom wasn’t as clean as I like it….although the toilet was spotless since I had to clean it 14 times a day!! :) When we had no children, my husband was so gracious and helped so much with the housework. But, face it, with no children there was pretty much no clutter and a pretty clean house. When I was sick and had a 3 year old, I tried to just read with and play with my daughter (while lying on the couch or bed). My husband worked more, so I actually had to ask a friend to come over every couple weeks and clean my house! Talk about humbling! “Can you please come clean my house while I lie on the couch and watch you? It hasn’t been cleaned in a couple weeks and is starting to get really funky…” Don’t be afraid to ask for help if you need it, but don’t worry about not having a spotless house. We’ve all been through it in varying degrees. A spotless, well-organized home at this point would just point to a more serious illness :)

    Marci’s last blog post…Get rid of the clutter!

  • http://www.clarke-family.net/brittany Britt

    I usually get in a bad mood…

    But I’ve really been working on letting things slide. Things in particular…anything…lol! Although, I really can’t stand when there are dishes left in the sink.

    Britt’s last blog post…Uganda Bound – 2010

  • http://www.clarke-family.net/brittany Britt

    I usually get in a bad mood…

    But I’ve really been working on letting things slide. Things in particular…anything…lol! Although, I really can’t stand when there are dishes left in the sink.

    Britt’s last blog post…Uganda Bound – 2010

  • http://krysslovacek.wordpress.com Krys

    I’ve only recently begun to be hard on myself (I’m pregnant, due any day now, and have had the nesting bug the entire pregnancy). But, I’ve read a lot about how you need to be prepared to let things slide once the baby’s born, since you’re pretty much feeding or changing, or napping for the first few weeks.

    I’ve created a schedule of small chores to do on a daily basis that will keep the household running (laundry, bill paying, vacuuming, wiping down counters, tubs, toilets), and I’ve been keeping up with them through these last few weeks, to get myself into the routine of doing them. These things take less than 20 minutes a day, and can be broken up into even smaller chunks of time, if needed.

    I’m lucky enough to have help lined up (my mother-in-law will come stay with us for a week or so), and we’ve stocked our freezer with things that my husband can make for dinner. So, I know that things won’t get out of control right at the beginning. Who knows what will happen after that? I’m trying to keep my expectations low!

    Krys’s last blog post…delayed!

  • http://krysslovacek.wordpress.com Krys

    I’ve only recently begun to be hard on myself (I’m pregnant, due any day now, and have had the nesting bug the entire pregnancy). But, I’ve read a lot about how you need to be prepared to let things slide once the baby’s born, since you’re pretty much feeding or changing, or napping for the first few weeks.

    I’ve created a schedule of small chores to do on a daily basis that will keep the household running (laundry, bill paying, vacuuming, wiping down counters, tubs, toilets), and I’ve been keeping up with them through these last few weeks, to get myself into the routine of doing them. These things take less than 20 minutes a day, and can be broken up into even smaller chunks of time, if needed.

    I’m lucky enough to have help lined up (my mother-in-law will come stay with us for a week or so), and we’ve stocked our freezer with things that my husband can make for dinner. So, I know that things won’t get out of control right at the beginning. Who knows what will happen after that? I’m trying to keep my expectations low!

    Krys’s last blog post…delayed!

  • http://organisingtips.blogspot.com Marcia Francois, Organising Qu

    Mandi, I focussed on ABSOLUTE essentials – cooking is essential, but not cleaning up afterwards (left for hubby), etc.

    I’m so glad I didn’t have any morning sickness (and these are twins) but that fatigue was bad enough :)

    Marcia Francois, Organising Queen’s last blog post…Don’t forget to sign up for the Virtual Organising Seminar

  • http://organisingtips.blogspot.com Marcia Francois, Organising Queen

    Mandi, I focussed on ABSOLUTE essentials – cooking is essential, but not cleaning up afterwards (left for hubby), etc.

    I’m so glad I didn’t have any morning sickness (and these are twins) but that fatigue was bad enough :)

    Marcia Francois, Organising Queen’s last blog post…Don’t forget to sign up for the Virtual Organising Seminar

  • http://freebates.blogspot.com Lori

    I’ll let the dishes slide to a degree…not emptying the dishwasher and piling dirties in the sink. But at some point when the sink is too full it has to get addressed. I let laundry go unfolded and get crumply in the baskets. I’ll let the playroom toys get out of hand for a while too.

    BUT! I can’t stand clutter on the counters, on the coffee table, or in the bathroom!

    After I let stuff slide, then I get in a tizzy and go into overdrive.

    Lori’s last blog post…I got my FREE Suave coupon today

  • http://freebates.blogspot.com Lori

    I’ll let the dishes slide to a degree…not emptying the dishwasher and piling dirties in the sink. But at some point when the sink is too full it has to get addressed. I let laundry go unfolded and get crumply in the baskets. I’ll let the playroom toys get out of hand for a while too.

    BUT! I can’t stand clutter on the counters, on the coffee table, or in the bathroom!

    After I let stuff slide, then I get in a tizzy and go into overdrive.

    Lori’s last blog post…I got my FREE Suave coupon today

  • Candy

    My workouts slide when needed altho I wish they were non negotiable. Sometimes they need to be to just make me feel better. Such an instant recharge. I can def get into survival mode when I need to and I have HAD to this last year with moving into a new house 3 days before delivering my baby – my goodness.

  • Candy

    My workouts slide when needed altho I wish they were non negotiable. Sometimes they need to be to just make me feel better. Such an instant recharge. I can def get into survival mode when I need to and I have HAD to this last year with moving into a new house 3 days before delivering my baby – my goodness.

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